There it was.
Everything I thought I wanted.
The thing missing from the picture?
You ever felt like that?
Like you're watching your life unfold in the most unexpected way... without those certain things you were CERTAIN you would have.
By now at least...
You'd find yourself THERE.
Wherever your there is.
I hope you are beginning to understand something.
THIS is beautiful.
This moment, this place, and this season.
Satan loves to get us so wrapped in what we think should be, that we miss the gift of NOW.
I'm really only starting to get this.
And as a human I'll honestly probably always struggle with it in some way or another.
But I am fighting it.
I'm fighting every HEY THAT'S MINE thought.
Everything that I think is missing from this moment really isn't.
Every time I wish my Dad was here, I think but he's with Jesus.
Doesn't make it hurt less but I wouldn't trade being at His feet for my Dad either.
I wouldn't trade the struggling to make ends meet financially right now... actually I would because, again, I'm human but the lessons about life I'm learning now... I wouldn't trade them.
I have to trust that God has decreed this season so it must be worthy.
Worthy of what?
Worthy of my life.
Of my time.
Of my ALL.
I admit it, to YOU my friend that recently every post on social media of engagement rings and new relationship statuses has left me on edge. Like I'm missing THAT.
Humanly, I hear my flesh cry HEY, THAT'S MINE.
But then the Holy Spirit calms my anxious heart.
As if Jesus takes my hand in His, I hear Him say:
I have YOU!
Then my soul catches on.
This season without those things, is a gift.
One that even when I have those things, I'll say "thank You, Lord for knowing best."
Maybe I can't be the mom I need to be someday without now...
But maybe its more than that.
Maybe that stuff is mine.
It just doesn't say it on Facebook.
My relationship status as far as the government is concerned is single right now.
But is it really?
Technically, yes. Really? No.
Because in reality I am someone's... I just don't know his name.
I don't know my future last name.
But I can say, that this PRESENT is mine.
And it is worth fighting for.
Worth living. Every single bit of it.
"Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be JOYFUL in hope, PATIENT in affliction, FAITHFUL in prayer. Share with the Lord's people who are in need. Practice hospitality." Romans 12:9-13
There is much to do.
My prayer is you will look at your life as is and say, HEY THAT"S MINE!!!
And LIVE it.